The Space In Between

“She is the oldest person I’ve ever coached,” the YMCA coach told my daughter, referring to me. I was taken aback. I  have never thought about myself in that category. 

When I sign up and show up for whatever class I show up for  with my 42 year-old body,  I say Okay, let’s go for it and play full  out. 

Only to remember as I slip into a challenging exercise who I am, where I’ve been and imagine what lies ahead in that space in between the age I think I am, the age I am pushing 80, and death.  Which could be eminent, as Dolly Parton has revealed since we are/were the same age. 

Why was I so taken with her death? Was it because she looked perpetually young and death never seemed to be on her horizon. Not that I aspire for her lifestyle of doing whatever she was doing that made her look the way she did. . 

Maybe it was her desire to share that drove her to use her voice, veiled in the reliquary of her curvaceous,  sequin-covered body with super styled blond hair to carry her sacred message of love and acceptance and cross boundaries.

I wasn’t aware of the intensity of her commitment to her values until we watched several episodes of her Heartstrings series where her most famous songs are brought to life in eight different stories. No blood, guts or gore. No violence. Just good stories of people coming up against life situations, testing boundaries and making decisions against the current cultural norms. 

I get it. The movies, the songs, her performances contained in this vehicle of  seamless gowns and smooth, ageless face carried her message across the space we dance around, tiptoe, step in and out of.